this was me when i was
depressed.
this was me when i was
fat.
this was me.
this is still me.
she is still me
except that i am stronger
now.
thats it.
i have been sososooss
sososososoooooo
low.
i have been so low
i have almost been
dead
.
i almost killed
myself in college
bc i didnt want to
be alive.
i almost killed myself
in college
bc i felt so godDAMN
alone and
unheard
and
lost.
this was me when i was
depressed,
and i am no longer afraid
to show her off for
she is beautiful, too.
i was so lost.
i was so lost and i was
so hurt and i was so
fucking depressed.
but now i yam okay!!!!
i yam okay bc i decided
that i would be okay!!!!
and so i am.
i am okay bc i am whole
and i am whole w everyone
i am whole w you guys,
fam.
we need each other.
do not run if you are
depressed now bc
you will. not. be.
depressed.
forever.
you will not.
i promise you
if you work for it —
if you grow/
and learn/
and REMEMBER?
if you do the work —
you will overcome.
///////
as much as id LIKE to
do the work for you
[and in some cases????
tbh????
w some of you????
w two of you
especially recently —
w two of you
unlucky lucky folks
recently,
{im sorry, vic]
[im sorry, ethan]
i tried to do
the work for you.
i tried to show my
full self to you and
drag/pull/beg
you to join me
in a way that
was scary
and
bad
for you.
that was scary and bad
for you and,
vic and ethan?
im so sorry i did that.
im so sorry i scared you.
im so sorry i didnt understand
yet. i went about it the
wrong way at first, and
for that im really sorry.
im sorry if i scared you
or hurt you.
im so friggen sorry,
my dudes.
please know that
i never want to scare you
or especially hurt you.
i never want to do that
to you two or anyone
but right now
especially you two,
bc you two are two
of my absolute faves,
but i will do it again
probably/definitely.
i will do it again.
i will be scary
and bad
again
probably/definitely,
and im sorry for
when i do that, too.
im really sorry
for when i do that.
but, please, when i
do do
(HAH! doo doo.
fucking loser
writing “doo doo”
lmfaoooo)
that again?
when i
do hurt you or scare
you again? please know
that i just want to
love you.
i just want to love you.
i just want to love you
both — thanks for not
shutting me out when
i was too much to handle.
i mean,
but honestly? if i felt
compelled to speak to
you in the way in which
i did? then that means
you’re strong enough to
handle it. you both are
so. strong.
fuck, are you guys so string
cheese fuckinnnnuh strong.
(everyone is)
(but right now im just
talking to my ethan and vic)
thanks for not saying im
not too much when ive
been told im too much
so
so
sosoosososososososos
many times.
wow, thank you.
thank you for not leaving
me, you FIERCE and
BEAUTIFUL WARRIORS.
THANK YOU BOTH.
SO MUCH, WOW.
thanks, fam.
whenever someone would
say i was too much,
it hurt me.
deeply and
truly. to my mf core,
mane. but thats okay,
and i am okay.
thanks for helping
us all be okay, vic
and ethan. u guys
knock my friggen
sOCKS off
(LMFAO ETHAN
LITERALLY ACTUALLY
KNOCKED MY SOCKS OFF
BC I USED TO WEAR SOCKS
W MY TEVAS BC I DIDNT
LIKE MY FEET BUT NOW
I DONT WEAR SOCKS
ABAHAHHA BUT ALSO NOW
I LIVE IN CA AND ITS TOO
HOT FOR SOCKS SO ITS
HOWEVER U WANNA LOOK
AT IT BUT I REally like
not wearing socks
bc i like my wide ass
motherfuccccckinnnnuhh
feet. and i rock mf tevas,
mane. i have like 7
pairs hahahaha and
thats cool cool cool.
//////
if u feel me then u
feel me and i think
u might just feel me
on this one.
//////
but you two have
never said that to me.
youve told me when to
slow down, for sure!!!!
youve told me to slow
down. and i thank you
both for that. thank you
for rolling w me.
u rock. oorah.]
//:://////
and in dragging
fearlessly but waaaay
too loudly?
i have failed miserably
and openly.
bc OBVIOUSLY
thats not how it works.
OBVIOUSLY you have
to be the one to do
the work for yourself.
you can bring a horse
to water or whatever
but you cannot
make that mf horse
drink.
drink, fam. drink.
drink up.
/////
cum, dude.
cum on in, my dudes
bc the water is foiiineeeee
and cumming is a lot
of fuggin fun
😏😏😏😏
/////
ty, cole ily boo