blankings & burdens

its 3:59AM and im wide awake 

i got out of class at 2:45PM and have been in bed and alone ever since

i finally got my work done for my marketing internship, though, which is cool. and i finished a paper. 

im not sure why i cant sleep. i couldnt nap either even though i didnt sleep much last night. 

my eating is pretty out of control. its only going to get worse now that ill never be in the laker. smoking to pass the time doesnt help either bc the munchies are hella real

im thankful im not experiencing depression right now bc today would have been really hard if i was. today was still pretty hard, but it would have been really, really hard. 

luckily, theres a light at the end of the tunnel and im gonna be just fine. its gonna be such a pain to move out of this house. 

get ready to be super sentimental. im nervous ive ruined graduation day for myself, and im kinda bummed about that bc i was really excited for it. we’ll see, though. i have time. 

im not going to wake up to 700 emails anymore. no ones gonna know what i do all day and no ones gonna care. im feeling pretty hollow. 

i thought katie would be alone all day but she seems to be just fine. i thought djorjie was leaving for serbia and leah would be alone all day but he hasnt left yet. turns out, its me. even kevin does things every once in a while. man, i fucked up. how is JJ okay w this lifestyle?

oh well – its making me stronger, right?

what IS a “typical” “college” “day” look like anyway? i think a lot of people do their own thing and i dont judge them. 

STOP THINKING PPL ARE JUDGING YOU HOLY SHIT YOURE SO INSECURE. GROW THE FUCK UP. PLEASE. 

im still wide awake. good thing i dont have classes on fridays rn. 

blankings & burdens

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s