curtains & i cant think of another “c” word bc I’m that off

and maybe it comes with the territory of growing up.

maybe, as we age, our awareness of ourselves comes into focus – the curtain of naive thoughts we grew up on falls to the side showing nothing but our true selves.

and, God, what a hard image to see. what a terrifying reflection to look back on.

everything i thought i knew about myself – my looks, my style, my personality, my strengths, my talents – they’ve been washed away by the demons of comparison and jealousy. i’ve always controlled those demons, but i’ve lost that control.

i feel like a waste of space accomplishing absolutely nothing. i have no direction. no motivation. no pride in anything i do. no passion.

where did i go? what am i going to do?

i think i need new scenery. i think i need to get out of this bubble. i think i need some sort of stimulation to re-invigorate myself.

if i stay here – in this place, in this mindset – I’m not going to make it.

curtains & i cant think of another “c” word bc I’m that off

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s